Like me, you've seen the headlines and heard the news stories of the massive Mattel toy recall.

Today (two weeks following the company's recall of countless Fisher Price toys) I have finally had a chance to review the product recall list, looking for the affected toys.

Surprisingly, I do not own any of the toys affected. Not the "Sarge" car, not the Batman, nor any of the Fisher Price toys. At least I don't THINK I own them.

Two of the toys that appear on the Fisher Price list—the Diego adventure belt and the Backyardigans figures—I know are in my house, somewhere. But I am supposed to be reassured by the fact that they were purchased prior to May 2007 so they are not part of the recall. I'm supposed to believe that they are safe? Says who?

This recall is just another reason to hate toys. Toys are made from cheap materials, shipped in excessive packaging, often break moments after you buy them, usually require a receipt to be returned, take up excessive amounts of floor and storage space, cause fights, make mothers go batty with all their dings, dongs and flashing lights, and never seem to get picked up or put away neatly.

Yes, kids and toys go together. But isn't there some company out there who can make toys that are high-quality, fun, educational, quiet, affordable, recyclable, packaged in a reusable container for easy storage and made in America?

If you know of a company like this, let us know. We want them on our show.